As adults, we dream of having kids, but we know this comes with responsibilities. One big step we deal with as parents is the task of discipline how we are going to teach our children to do right not wrong. Some parents use moral ethics, values, and love. More parents could benefit from disciplining their kids in a more productive way for example being the authoritative parent, those who provide only the best combination of love and discipline but is not overbearing, the parent is compassionate yet firm in authority. They have clear boundaries however are terribly caressing. But there are other’s parents that use aggression, spanking and the use of profanity and forget the importance of effective discipline. They become the neglectful parent. The parent that doesn’t express much love and doesn’t really care enough for the child’s needs or discipline. The parents’ neglect may be due to their own trauma and chaos, like an addiction. Children should not be emotionally or physically disciplined for three reasons.
First off if you choose to be a parent it would lead us to think we want to be the best parent we can be. But today you have ineffective parenting and is “controversial and polarizing” as stated by (Ellen Bass) because not all parents have the required parenting skill that is necessary to raise a child in a positive environment throughout their entire childhood. Lack of parenting skills can lead to poor social development and with this, the child, in the long run, will have a very hard time adapting into society. It is very important that parents remain alert while raising their kids and should get rid of any attributes that lead to ineffective parenting. If not, it will develop into neglect.
We all know children always look to feel secure, especially with their parents. Parents should be careful to avoid any situation that may make their kid feel unwanted. Responsible parents will always try hard to keep their children safe. Ignorance from the parents’ side would make the child feel lonely and abandoned. Some parents abuse their kids physically by hitting them and by not caring whether they eat or bathe themselves then you also got many who abuse their kids verbally yelling and by using profanity to put their kids down. There is many who feel violence will help set child straight but it’s not true. Both have a long-term negative impact on the growth of the child. As parents we have the right to correct our children, but we must be careful about the body language we display and the language in which we speak with. Is important that as parents we avoid being harsh with children. We should handle children with respect and with a delicate touch for it becomes a form of neglect once aggression is involved. These three reasons need to be stopped why the need to neglect, physical abuse and verbally abuse children we must come to the realization that it’s inhumane.
Being inhumane is the worst thing we can become as parents or as human beings because as a child most of us are taught to love, respect and cherish one and another to learn and grow in a harmonious atmosphere. Although some children grow under unfortunate circumstances this does not mean we have to act inhumanely. According to the Bible (The Student Bible New International Version) we need to learn to love everybody. There are parents who get a sense of pleasure out of treating children abusively. There are parents who, having been raised in strict and abusive environments end up repeating the pattern and the mistakes their parents did when they become parents themselves. The truth is there are many cases where parents don’t have compassion for their children, they feel their children bring them misery, so they make their children suffer and this is cruel and inhumane.
The reality is we don’t need to live in a world where our children can’t be safe there are ways to stop the neglect and the ineffective parenting. We can’t expect children to predict with accuracy what will happen if they misbehave. We can, however, prepare ourselves to deal with the child in a positive manner. Like do you spend time each day with your children engaging in meaningful activity or conversations? Do we take time to talk through misunderstandings and misbehaviors when we are calm and level-headed? By practicing these few things, we can stop being inhumane but to do this we must come together as a community and if we see something, we know isn’t right report it because you must imagine yourself in that child’s shoes wouldn’t you want to be helped if you were that child. We don’t have to be abusive in any way with children as parents to get a point across all they need is guidance and love. Children deserve respect too.
Chip, Ingram. Effective child discipline. Tyndale House Publishers , 2018.
Ellen, Bass. The Courage to Heel. Collins Living , 1988.
Siegel, Daniele J. No Drama Discipline . New York : Random House Publishing , 2016.
The Student Bible New International Version. Student Bible. Michigan: Zondervan Publishing House, 1986.
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