One behavior I would like to consider changing is my self confidence. Often times I struggle with insecurity and the ability to feel sanguine in myself. I have spent a lot of time in my life feeling I need other people’s approval, or played the role as a people pleaser, in order to feel conclusive.
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I have feelings as I am not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough. Without the approval of others, I feel worthless. To live out life this way can become exhausting, and I have acknowledged that continuing this behavior can deprive myself to try new things. My goal is to feel good about myself. I want to believe in myself. I am deciding to take the steps necessary in order to become more self-assured woman. I have made the choice to change this behavior because I have been depriving myself the opportunities.
I believe my lack of self confidence stems from my fear of rejection. I experience some nerves when placed in certain situations, including job interviews, first dates, even meeting new people that can potentially lead to rejection, that the fear becomes crippling (Fritscher, L., & Gans, S. (2018, March 19)). An external resource that I plan on using in order to boost my self confidence is the UNC Charlotte counseling center. I believe that having this resource will enable me to making decisions that will improve my lifestyle and discover my inner strength. Along with counseling, further support will come from the sisters of my sorority, Zeta Tau Alpha. These women push me to become the better version of myself. They give me the strength to find value in myself no matter what others think of me. These girls remind me that I am strong, capable and beautiful. I am lucky to have people like this in my life to help me realize my feelings of worthlessness aren’t true.
A goal of mine is to be more open and willing to make positive changes in my life. I order to achieve this goal I must start by cleaning out negative thoughts and emotions. Most negative beliefs that are in my mind/life are due to my cooperation and I have the ability to change that (Fetting, S. (n.d.)). How I feel about myself will radiate overall happiness and contentment. Another goal is to try new activities and connect with new people. Happiness is closely ties to the quality of relationships in life. Lastly, I will strive to step outside of my comfort zone. In order to do so, I must be aware of my old habits that hindered me in doing so. These short term goals will make it more efficient for me to reach my long term goal of overall self confidence.In order to keep track of my progress over the next 30 days, I plan to write down five reasons why I want to have a higher self esteem. Do I want to be more comfortable meeting new people? Do I want to live a happier and more fulfilled life? etc. (Fetting, S. (n.d.)). This will help me visualize the results I desire and evoke feelings of happiness and fulfillment. ReferencesFetting, S. (n.d.). Tips for Building Self-Confidence. Retrieved from http://absoluteconfidence.com/confidence-resources/tips-for-building-self-confidenceFritscher, L., & Gans, S. (2018, March 19).
The Impact of Fear of Rejection. Retrieved from https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-the-fear-of-rejection-2671841My progress in working towards my goal of achieving overall self confidence was achieved. Once I decided I didn’t want to feel the way I was feeling anymore, everything sort of just clicked. I decided I was going to start believing in myself and not focus on what others thought of me. Some days were hard, but whenever times got difficult I had the support system of my friends to help me get through it. I worked through the hard times by shutting out the world around me and focused on the positives.
It was not long before I started accomplishing the goals that I wanted to, and never imagined I could accomplish. I am doing better in school, living a healthy lifestyle, and have an overall happiness and joy in life. I have never felt so good about the person I am and where I am in life. This experience has taught me how to carry myself and not care so much about how other people look of me. I no longer look at myself as not worthy, and if I want to achieve something, I no longer sit around and wish for it. I pursue it. If there is one thing I have learned from this project it is that I have the ability to turn my life around for the better. The thoughts that I had in my head were all mental, and I am worthy of so much more than what I was giving myself credit for. This course has taught me that mental health is just as important as physical health. If you lack positive mental health it can harm your overall well being.
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