Before I begin, let me ask you how many of you agree that parents have no right to control the lives of their children now? The answer one gives to this question will likely include, either implicitly or explicitly, particular assumptions about the grounds of parental rights. Parenthood and biological parenthood are often seen as synonymous. But of course, adoptive parents are also parents by virtue of assuming the parental role. This common sense fact opens the door for a consideration not only of the possible connections between biology and parenthood but other issues as well, such as the role of consent in acquiring parental rights, which then leads to a host of other questions that are not only theoretically important but existentially significant as well.
What does it mean for a parent to possess rights, as a parent? Why think that such rights exist? What obligations do parents have to their children? What is the role of the state, if any, concerning the parent-child relationship? These questions are central for our understanding of the moral, social, personal, and political dimensions of the parent-child relationship. In my speech, I disagree partially to the topic that I will talk about that parents have no right to control the lives of their children above 16? This is because the children themselves are not mature enough. They are very immature in all ways that parents have to guide them. My second point is, most of the parents find that this age, they are vulnerable that makes parents always worry most of the time. In addition, with no control and attention from parents can affect the negative influence for the children. The point that I agree is because the children should be given the freedom of their own life. And another point is the preparation to adult phase for their future. Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for your attention.
Back to my talk, of course, parents have a strong grip on the safety, responsibility, and productivity of their children. Children are immature. Children made a decision based on what they like, not necessarily good for them. I give you an analogy, if there are ice cream and vegetables, children would most probably pick ice cream, because it is tasty, sweet, interesting but they don’t know the harm it inflicts and they don’t know that vegetables are better. All children need education and guidance from parents. We see children in today’s era have been too free with their outside world. Including criminal cases, they always do. The beginning is the need to educate parents at home to monitor them and their activities. Parents need to give early education to their children so that they can learn good things like respecting others, fears of older people, not wanting to do bad things.
Otherwise, if we see teenage crime now very high and the range of crimes they make in our unexpected adulthood. If we as parents do not care about this problem then the children will be neglected and continue to make mistakes such as we see teens who sniff the glue, give birth to children out of wedlock, steal, and so on at a young age. From that example, we as adults are saddened by the fate they have experienced at their young age as they have been trapped and the dark future. Teenagers are not the bright minds that they often like to believe they are. And if somebody doesn’t stop them, they will do something unbearably dangerous. As a parent, it’s hard to get past our biological demands to protect our own kids from the world’s bullshit, but there is absolutely a time when we have to. The problem is knowing the line. Yeah, it’s probably a good idea to flat-out prevent them from tattooing racial slurs on their face but it may be to their benefit to just let them find out on their own that speaking like a gang member when they’re trying to be taken seriously isn’t going to work out in most social non-gang settings. The second point is parents find that this age, they are vulnerable which is making parents worried about their children. Parents are still responsible for teens even when they are 16-17 years old. By law, If you are in Malaysia they are still considered minors and if parents aren’t doing their job protecting the 16-17 years old then they can still be charged and filed for possible child abuse/neglect. My belief is if you are under 18 you do have to follow the rules of your parents. If you are told to be home a certain time, Then you get home at that time, If you are told not to drink at a party and do then they have every right to be disappointed in you. If your parents don’t want you dressing in a way where you are showing cleavage, Etc then you should get dressed in something less revealing (however most teens ignore this and dress in the revealing way anyway) If you self-harm/are depressed and are under the age of 18 they are able to put you in a mental health facility, Among much more because you are under 18. They don’t ‘have’ to buy you a car just because you turned 16.
In today’s world, a select few people have jobs by 16-17 and the parents are still supporting everything financially. From the clothes, they want the games and electronics they want, the foods they want and etc. If you are 18 or older and living at home such as still living in your parents home then you do follow their rules. Since you are 18 they do have the choice to decide if you still can live in the house. If they want you to have a job to keep living at home then you find one. If they want you to support yourself financially (in terms of food, clothes, etc) then you find a way to do so by getting a job. I know of several people 18+ still living at home and being handed literally anything they want from food, clothes, games and etc as if they were still kids. Dear fellow friends, as the two points above that I disagree, I also have two points of agree to elaborate in this talk. The point is children themselves should be given the freedom for their own life. I believe in escalating freedom of the children as they show more maturity. But at the end of the day, a parent is responsible for the actions of their children and can be held accountable for those things until a child reaches the age of majority. If a parent has no control over the teenager, how can they be held accountable for anything the children does, realistically? This control can only be limited if the law disjoints this responsibility from parents. Just because you spawned a child doesn’t mean you know what’s right for it. I believe that parents should not have as much power over their teenagers as some parents believe they deserve. Many parents like to believe that they always know what’s best for their offspring. Becoming a parent doesn’t mean that you have all the answers. Becoming a parent doesn’t make you infinitely wise either. Many parents also like to justify their controlling attitude towards their offspring’s life by claiming they have had more life experience. After all, ‘they were a teenager too once.’ Yes, they have had more life experience and yes, they were a teenager. But they were a teenager in a different time and they only have an experience of their life which isn’t likely to resemble the life of their offspring at all! Does that make their experience largely irrelevant when applying it to a different person living a different life in a different time with different ideas? I just struggle to understand why parents insist on having control of their teenager offspring by claiming that they know what’s best… How could you possibly know that? The best person to ask is your offspring… But they are obviously far less intelligent and mindful and responsible than you and obviously are not capable of making good decisions, right? My dear fellow classmates, Let your child live their own life. My final point is children should be able to make their own choices, even if they may sometimes be wrong or foolish so that they can see for themselves the consequences.
It’s important for a teenager to become more independent and responsible for their actions so that they are prepared for the adult world. Teens have different mindsets to adults, however, I think adults and children should be treating each other with equal respect and trust. Parents are always telling their kids that: ‘this is wrong’, ‘you shouldn’t do this’ because they don’t want to see their child turn bad or suffer which in turn hurts the parents themselves. But if you look at it in another way, children never restrict their parents from doing something. When parents are signing divorce papers, their children are in hurt but does that change some parent’s decision? When parents are drinking all night and then vomiting in the toilet, this makes their child feel sadness, but do some adults stop being alcoholic? When parents are smoking and then dying of lung cancer, their children are also dying inside from the grief, but do some parents stop smoking? Children are not restricting you from doing what you want, so why are should you restrict them? Making mistakes are hurting both the parent and the child. So, in my opinion, I believe that both child and parent should both guide each other but not ‘control’ or else you wouldn’t be living your life. Your children are not stupid, they can make the right choices if you trust them, in return adults should also start thinking about their own choices and mistakes.
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