One day I heard the privilege of visiting a gay bar. I did this not once or even twice, actually severally. I did not visit the place as a gay given I am a straight person but just wanted to learn a bit from them. I purpose to get familiarized with their way of living, understand their point of view when it came to lifestyle choices. For the nights I was in the bar I observed their character and it was not as strange as I could imagine. Aside from them living as homosexuals it was basically very normal. The interactions and their stories were normal. The bar was a safe space for them as it was that one place that they could freely interact without anyone judging them for their actions.
I chose a gay bar because I knew this was one place I could get to learn from them easily. This is because they do not have to hide their character in order to fit in the society with fear of being misjudged. In the bar they would do the things they normally did and so easier to learn from them.
Some of the preconceptions I had about the place is the resistance I thought I would experience. The gay people are quite accommodating and do not judge anyone for their lifestyle. They are social and interact with everyone. I at first thought I would get some resistance due to the fact that I am not one of them. There are however some small personal biases you would encounter. Some gays prefer to be left alone in their safe space without disturbance. Mingling out there is very difficult for them. it is even harder for them to spot their mates as not so many are bold enough to come out. In a gay bar however they can easily mingle with their fellow gays and even build their network. In that way they would be able to address the issues they face.
I learned so much from the conversation we had with them. Most of the gay couples experience difficulty in convincing their family members of their choice. Some have even been chased away from their homes because of their stand. They feel bad when they are being judged by everyone each time. I learnt the importance of associating with the gays freely without having a biased mind setting. They are normal human beings who do not enjoy to be ill-treated. They deserve to be treated with respect as they also have their rights.
If I were to repeat my experience with them I would have made a lot of changes. I would erase the wrong conceptions I had about them. I would freely interact with them but in other areas that would not interfere with their safe space. This is because they also deserve space where they can meet and share their experiences together. There are a lot of things I have learnt from the gays. If I were to counsel one of them then I do not think I would experience difficulty. This is because I have gotten the chance of mingling with them and learning about them.
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